Saturday 15 September 2007

Pass the bottle


I'm sitting here spooning this cough medicine into my face when my eyes alight on these words on the bottle, right up there in front, in big red letters: Alcohol free. I do a double take and almost spill the sticky stuff. No alcohol? What kind of sick, sadistic sod would take the alcohol out of cough medicine?

I don't need this. When I'm feeling like I've been run over several times by a truck, I need to see stuff like: "50% more alcohol than the other leading brand!" and "More alcohol added!" Given the choice between suffering with a little buzz on and suffering stone cold sober, I'd take the buzz any day. A hangover might actually be an improvement on the general state of things.

Pharmaceutical companies, don't make me start a campaign. Put the damned alcohol back in the cough medicine where it belongs, please. Put the fun back into having a cold, for the love of Mike, whoever he is.

6 comments:

PJ said...

And I remember when Benylin cold medicine tasted kinda sweet, so I didn't mind drinking it when I was sick (or even when I wasn't). I tried it again recently and it tasted like medicine - not nice at all! At least honey and lemon will always taste good.

Hope you feel better soon.

Anonymous said...

The moral minority is the cause of all this "freeness" in the World.

Instead of removing the alcohol, which is the second best medicine ever invented, insert a proper warning such as:

Alcohol in sufficient quantities is nice and may temporarily eliminate the need for the other person to have plastic surgery. More than sufficient quantities are usually necessary in coping with cases of a love lost or a love gained. Do not operate heavy equipment in public or in bed when under the influence as judgment will be impaired and it can get extremely embarrassing if word ever got out.

Liane Spicer said...

Pj, thanks, I feel much better. And I really don't know what's with this medicine-tasting-like-medicine trend.

aka_lol, ROTFLMAO! If laughter is really the best medicine I'm in good hands. I wish I could get this image out of my head now - the one about operating heavy equipment in bed. Kyahh, ha, ha, haarrrrrrr..........

Gosh. That was good.

Matt said...

Thank you for the encouraging words on my blog. It means a lot, especially from someone like yourself who is further down the road to publication.

Liane Spicer said...

You're welcome, Matt. I truly enjoy your writing, and your sense of humour.

Cheryl St.John said...

Hilarious post!