There's been a rash of weddings around here. My mom has been to three, my sister one - all within the last couple of months.
I was married once. I was 25, the boy was 22, and it was an unequivocal disaster. My upbringing was Roman Catholic and strict. I had attended only single-sex convent schools. I suppose something of the conditioning got through to me because I never fooled around. This guy was my first boyfriend, first lover. I was supposed to marry him, although I think that in my heart I knew I was making a mistake.
When I'm asked my marital status I always say I'm happily divorced, and that's the truth. So, would I marry again? I don't rule it out, but I'm, ahem, middle-aged now, so I don't have the time for an experimental marriage, or a rotten one.
People marry for love, but love alone won't cut it. I'm old enough to know that now.
People marry to raise a family. I've already raised mine, thank you.
People marry for financial security. I'm capable of providing for myself adequately.
People marry for companionship. I really like my own company so I couldn't marry for that reason alone.
People marry for sex. Ha. I know married couples who aren't getting much... And I believe in the updated adage about the cow and the milk: Why buy a whole pig just to get a little sausage? (Vulgar but true.)
People marry to conform to other people's, and society's, expectations. I was never much of a conformist to begin with, and as the years pass I'm even less so.
So where does that leave me? Happily divorced. Happily (most of the time) single. Thankful that I'm not one of those many, many unhappily married, 'fronting' people, putting on a pretend smile in public. And truly admiring of those few couples I know who actually got it right.