Thursday, 8 May 2008
Ode to keyboard
I've been using an old laptop of my brother's since my computer died last year. My bro swears it's the best computer he's ever had. It's got quite a personality, this old Sony.
The '3' and '4' number keys don't work, which means that the number and dollar signs don't either. I either have to bring up the onscreen keyboard and do acrobatics, or activate the keypad thingy which shares keys with several letters of the alphabet. Of course I never remember to turn it back off until I type something like this: t was a dar2 and st6r0y n5ght.
The screen was shattered by my niece and/or nephew (who never confessed to the crime), so the laptop is hooked up to the monitor from a brand new computer I bought last year that died after three months. A rather uncomfortable arrangement.
Sometimes, for no discernable reason, the cursor takes off for parts unknown, so I type away busily until I glance at the screen and it dawns on me that I've just typed an entire paragraph somewhere in the middle of a mess of text well north of the actual bullseye.
There are several missing function keys as well - no, not the naughty niece and nefarious nephew again: I mean missing as in no smart designer has come up with them yet.
A 'wtf' key.
An 'oh, shit!' key.
A 'go to hell' key.
A 'leave me the hell alone can't you see I'm working' key.
A key that transmits a maniacal braying sound when I'm seriously tickled by something I read on a blog. LOL just doesn't cut it.
Which keys are missing from your keyboard?